When we are in pain and we seek help from our friends and well wishers, we normally hear two kinds of statements. Some suggest us to forgive and move on with our lives while others suggest us to give the perpetrators the same blow which they inflicted on us. The second piece of advice sounds very appealing and most of the people follow this road. Whereas there are few who do want to forgive but they are confused. The question which troubles their mind is " Why should I forgive? ". 

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Lets be very realistic. We are ordinary human beings with human like senses, feelings and shortcomings.

When someone gives us pain, we feel hurt, sadness, remorse and many of the so called "lower emotions". For saint like people, it's a different story. But for ordinary people like us it's not easy to forgive and forget. Let's accept we are ordinary people. But don't we have the right to get out of our pain and feel a sense of calm and peace? Of course we do. Hence the need for this article to explain how ordinary people can tackle a painful situation or incident and maintain their sanity and peace.

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Different religions have spoken about rebirth and reincarnation. Well can it be true? For now lets be open minded and consider this possibility.

 

Which Religions believe in Reincarnation?

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Shamanism, Druidism, Norse mythology, Sumerians, Zoroastrianism, Hinduism, Jainism, Buddhism,  Sikhism, Voodoo, Judaism, the early Christians also believed in reincarnation, Gnosticism, Confucianism, Taoism, Shinto, Aztecs, Greek etc. 

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In easy terms this means when we die, our body perishes but our soul does not die. It is born again with a different body. This would also make the theory of Karma very applicable. So lets suppose today I hurt you and got away with it, but karma won't spare me, it will punish me either in this birth or next birth, either through you (same soul but with a different body) or through another person. This sounds a bit satisfactory isn't it? So nobody can escape. This also makes us aware of a higher presence a divine being who is keeping a watch on each soul and who is fair.

 

So lets analyse our situation now. The person who hurt us did a wrong thing but did we deserve it? Well there may be a possibility that we had hurt this soul in our past birth and now it's time to settle our karmic accounts. So this person comes in our life at the right time and does exactly what is needed for our soul. Well how can pain be needed by our soul? We all have heard - 'No pain no gain'. Sometimes pain does us more good than we can imagine.

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Now what happens if we give back the same pain to the person who hurt us. Well unfortunately we get entangled in the karmic loop. Instead of closing our karmic account we loop it. So in the next birth also, this soul will come in our life, with a new body and will inflict us with the pain he/she got from us. This will go on and on. The worst possibility may be that we both will stay under the same roof. Yes it's true. Have you  noticed usually our near and dear ones hurt us more. So it's a point to be considered. The number of negative or black balls we threw towards  that person will bounce back and come to us. Now can we stop this? Yes we can. The tool is 'Forgiveness Saadhna '. 

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Lets delve a bit further. So are we expected to forgive a rapist, a murderer, a terrorist? This doesn't sound right isn't it?

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Broadly there are two stages of forgiveness :

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1) Traditional Forgiveness [( Outer Forgiveness +  Inner Forgiveness (with residual need to condemn)]  & 

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2) Radical forgiveness [(Outer Forgiveness +  Inner Forgiveness (with no victim consciousness)]

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With TRADITIONAL FORGIVENESS , the willingness to forgive is present but so is the residual need to condemn. Therefore victim consciousness is maintained and nothing changes.

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With RADICAL FORGIVENESS , the willingness to forgive is present but NOT the need to condemn. Therefore the victim consciousness is dropped, and everything changes. 

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(Victim Consciousness is defined as the conviction that someone else has done something bad to you, and as a direct result, they are responsible for the lack of peace and happiness in your life).

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Lets delve a bit further with the help of an example. Some one robbed us. Are we supposed to hug the robber? 

 

No. We have to put the robber behind bars else he /she will commit more crimes. This is Outer Forgiveness. But internally we should not keep blaming him/her for our suffering. We have to understand that it was just a karmic account settlement. We definitely have done the same with either this soul or with any other soul. The universe keeps a watch on everything and no body is spared. Traditional Forgiveness will make us believe that we did something good for the other person i.e the person who hurt us or robbed us by forgiving him/her. Radical Forgiveness will be to understand that nobody is responsible for my pain and suffering. The pain was necessary for the growth, learning and purification of my soul. Hence no need to condemn or feel being a victim.

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In order to remember this daily we are providing you with two videos.

 

1A) Simple Forgiveness Sadhna (English)                                                2A) Powerful Forgiveness Saadhna (English)